I was reading this advice column in one of my favorite mags the other day when I was a little more than stunned to hear the columnist suggest that a teen who wants a graduation party may be asking for something excessive and that over the top parties can encourage teens to feel entitled.
I’m not sure I understand where the columnist was going with that one. It was just a blurb and then tells the parent that if so, stand ground and don’t give in.
Hmm…
Do you think that having a graduation party is excessive? When you think about it, any over the top party can create a feeling of entitlement in a child, (How many all-out birthday parties have you been to this year for your child?) but I don’t think that asking for a graduation party is out of line or excessive. If anything, I think that anyone who graduates from anything is entitled to celebrate it – ESPECIALLY if the odds were stacked against them in the first place.
Of course it is always the parents’ responsibility to make sure a party doesn’t go over the top and I think that’s where the columnist makes her mistake. She assumes that the teen wants a party-to-end-all-parties. She assumes the parent lets the teen lead the way.
I bought very little for my graduation party (Ahem) some so-many years ago. I shared my party with my cousin – as she also graduated and though I invited everyone I knew, mostly my closest friends showed up and family. I remember it being neither over the top or excessive.
Why is that? Because my father and my aunt and uncle were in control. That’s what happens when the parent is in charge.
I think that my advice to anyone wondering if they should have a graduation party for their teen, I would have to say Yes! It’s a milestone in a person’s life to have graduated high school and be moving forward into adulthood. However, you’re in charge. You decide what to splurge on and what not to… if your teen wants more than the average cake, cookout and friends… then they need to help foot the bill. After all, paying your way in life is part of being an adult.
What’s your take? Was the columnist off on her suggestion that a party is excessive or leads to entitlement?
