The Guilty Parent

I’m sure everyone has seen recently the mom in Minnesota who defied a court order for her son to receive chemo for Hodgkins Lymphoma that has spread or the mom found guilty in Wisconsin for not getting her daughter medical care for Diabetes, and using prayer to try and heal her .  The girl died of diabetes in 2008.

courtesy Jason Morrison

Both of these stories scare me to no end.  But not for the reasons you may think.  Let me explain before you leave, thinking I’m a parenting freak.  Both of my kids were immunized and do receive regular medical care.  I have taken them to the ER  as needed.  But I do question their doctors before I agree to thing.  Do they need that antibiotic?  Can we delay this shot?  Are steroids for asthma a good thing?  And most of the time, we have discussed it and I agree to the needed treatment.

However, I have gone against my doctor’s advice.  When my daughter was four, we discovered she had fluid in her ears that would not drain out.  It caused her some hearing loss.  We consulted with an ENT.  The doctor’s  advice was we take out the tonsils and adenoids, which I was not opposed to.  But she wanted to put in ear tubes at the same time.  I said no.  I know how much fun ear tubes can be, my brother in law had them until he was 20.  I did not want to do it and asked it we could wait until the day before the surgery to make a final decision.  She was not happy, but hesitantly agreed.

The day before the surgery, there was no fluid in my daughter’s ears, so she decided to hold off until later if needed.  I was relieved.  But scared until that day.  I had a fear that she would go against my wishes and put the tubes in anyway.  Then I would be stuck with their care and maintenance, not the doctor.

It’s scary to question your doctor.  But at the end of the day, I have to live with the decisions I make, why aren’t these moms allowed to?  They want to treat their child with prayer?  I see it no differently that antibiotics and Tylenol.  I fear the day that parents will be arrested and forced to get medical treatment for a child because a court decides that is what’s best for the child.  What if you are strongly against vaccines and agree to live with that choice?  Does a court have the right to force your child to get the shots, if you understand what could happen?  Do I want to feel threatened with legal action for doing what I think is in the best interest of my child?

I watch these cases with great interest.  I never want  a court to determine how I should take care of my child.  And no one else should have to go throught it.  These two families, and many others, have been through enought without the courts getting into it.

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University of Washington

As referenced in my product review of Walking Wings, I have a baby with nursemaids elbow.  Baby K is my third born child, and he is much like my first born having this nursemaids elbow. I am lucky in that I have dealt with one child already who had the issue and now know how to properly handle a child with this problem.

You will find I refer to nursemaids elbow as a “issue”, “problem”, or even “injury” because honestly I have yet to find the proper term for it. Nursemaids elbow is a common injury that can occur from birth all the way to age five. This article is more of a way to let more Moms know this is an all too common injury that may lead to pediatricians,  emergency room personnel and others blaming someone for the injury occurring. Please know that nursemaids elbow is not something that occurs because of abuse, neglect or similar associated with child mistreatment.

What is nursemaids elbow:

An injury that occurs when the child’s arm is slightly pulled {without intending harm} that makes the elbow “pop” out of socket. The joint where your elbow is to sit is slightly too large for the child’s elbow, but will grow into itself within the first four to five years of life.

Nursemaids elbow is an interposition of the annular ligament into the radial-humerus joint. The annular ligament normally passes around the proximal radius just below the radial head. With traction on the extended arm, the annular ligament slides over the head of the radius into the joint space and becomes entrapped. - Taken from The University of Chicago Pritzer School of Medicine Pediatrics Clerkship

How does it occur?

Nursemaids elbow can occur for something as simple as a child rolling over, not letting go of the child’s hand when they are falling, holding babies hand while they pull themselves up, and many other similar situations.

What can I do?

Aside from feeling really guilty about your child constantly having their elbow pop out of place, you can be aware that your child has this problem. Make family, friends and any others who may play with, babysit or be near your child aware of nursemaids elbow and how fragile your child’s arm truly is.

Will my child outgrow this?

YES! Most children outgrow nursemaids elbow by age 4 or 5. My first born didn’t have an occurrence after age 2, but pediatricians have told me up to age 5 they can be at risk for nursemaids elbow.

Disclosure: I am writing this as one Mom to another parent to make more people aware of this injury, and am in no way a medical expert. If you feel your child may have nursemaids elbow the only way you can find out for sure is to discuss with your pediatrician or family doctor.

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